Embrace The Rainbow

Embrace The Rainbow
Embrace The Rainbow

Friday, September 9, 2011

Girl in Time Out

  Alright it's time for me to take a time out from....haha not here that's for sure. Time out from all my blood family and the bullshit. So I know I have to wash my own clothes (I hate it I really do.) but, when someone has only one load of laundry and that consists mostly of my clothes to begin with. (My sister is a real pain.) I don't think it is to much to ask for her to wash a couple items of my clothing while I wash the rest.

  She's taking out on me the fact that I will not cater to her. As in fix her food and bring it right back to her. I am not her slave and nor is she mine. but, acting like a bitch afterwards towards me isn't going to work.

  What prompted this really was the fact I brought over all my clothes from her house to wash myself. I put it in the basket with other clothes but, to the side. She comes in stomping and huffing and goes tattle tales on me. One I don't find it fucking wrong to bring my clothes over to the washer so I myself can wash them. It's not a big deal it's a throw them in put a cup and a half of laundry soap in and let them wash for 20 minutes. One our washer at my mother's is outside, it has been raining for three days and I don't want my clothes getting wet until they hit the washer (It's stopped raining for a few minutes.) She is getting on my last fucking nerve. Not only is she getting on the last nerve but, it is starting to affect my mood. It's starting to make me feel like I am wrong to be mad at her.

  Maybe this seems petty to people but, the fact that she can treat me in whatever way she wants without getting yelled at for any of it hurts like a mother fucker. Yet, as soon as I start getting mad and raising my voice at her I am told by not one but both of my parents to shut the fuck up?!?!? Okay this is ranting and raving me but, how the fuck is that right? You treat one child like they are better than the other just because she is pregnant? How is it right that the excuse given is she is pregnant and hormonal? Excuse me this is how she acted BEFORE she ever got pregnant. Before that baby was ever even thought of or created.


  My hands are shaking so bad because I am so angry and hurt and in need of some serious talking to with my Partners. I want to ask them a few things before I make my move to Tennessee. (Which is about to be soon because I can't take much more without a mental breakdown. I cry enough without her help.) I'm going to go for a walk in a few minutes to see if I can calm down. Get something to eat in my body before the walk and just make sure I can and do calm down.


  1. I'm sorry that you're having such a hard time honey. Because of the overwhelming dangers that a pregnant woman faces if she gets stressed, people do tend to excuse bad behavior, even if that behavior existed before hand. I'm not saying it's right, I'm just saying that that's what it is. When I was pregnant no one gave me special treatment, when I had my miscarriage they were all apologizing "We shouldn't have let you walk to the store that one time!" The fact is some people are healthier and can take being pregnant and some women overreact to the feeling of this other "being" growing inside of them. That doesn't give them leave to be intentionally hurtful though and I'm glad you understand that.

    I think that you should definitely talk with your partners and get all of your questions answered so that you can make your move to Tennessee, because if the situation is causing YOU this much stress then you need to do what's best for you and get out. Plain and simple.

    {HUGZ AND SQUEEZES} I hope things work out for you soon babycakes!


  2. ~Hugs and Squeezes Vee~ I know all of the risks of pregnancy and I am not saying I want to cause her stress I just don't want to stress out myself. I'm sorry about your miscarriage Vee I know that had to be hard I know how much you want kids.

    I'm talking to one of my partners right now hopefully everything gets answered and the move can happen.

  3. *Shrug* It was a hard year. It was right after my fiancee passed away so the miscarriage was most likely because of that. But yes, I do want children badly. If I could find me a sperm donor or something, I'd be pregnant right now. LOL.

    I know you don't want to stress her out honey, but like I said, you don't want to be in a situation that stresses you out either. If she's healthy enough to be a pain, then she's healthy enough to handle you putting her in her place verbally.

    I hope everything works out with your partners, that every question is answered and your fears are put at ease. I can't wait to see how your blog changes once you're with them!

  4. If you find that sperm donor you let me know! That is a hard deal Vee and I hope you never have to go through it again.

    I try to put her in her place and my parents jump to her defense it's annoying. I'm not sure how to put her into her place verbally with them defending her all the time.

    So far so good with the questions not fully done but we're both busy running around here and there to get things. I think when I am with them I'll be a much happier woman and I'll have a lot of things that are good to say. Just gotta get to that point and place in time.

  5. I KNOW you'll be happier when you're with them. Home is where the heart is and your home is what makes you happy and if your heart is with them then that's where you'll be happiest.

    I don't know where to even go about finding a sperm donor. A cheap one anyway. Plus I want to wait until I've moved wherever it is that I decide to move to. I have no idea where that's going to be though. I have always loved Boston and had actually made plans to move there right before I enlisted in the Army but I'm hesitant about going there.

    As far as your sister goes, don't raise your voice, just take a very deep breath, get centered and very calm and look at her and in a very emotionless tone tell her that the way she's acting is not healthy for the baby (first of all) and then whatever else you want to say. If your parents jump to her defense you can just look at them and in the same calm tone point out that you're not raising your voice so you're not stressing her out.

    The best advice I can give though? Move. LOL.

  6. BTW, is it bad when my word verifications start to repeat? *looks at doetsto...I've had this word before*

  7. Your right as always. My home is exactly where my heart is and that is with my partners. I wouldn't know where my life would have ended up if they hadn't of popped into it. I sure as hell don't want to find that one out.

    You need to follow your heart to Vee...where ever it leads you. I know it's hard right now for you to do that BUT, when you can do it. (Cheap sperm donors are one night stands...Ooops ~Smacks her own mouth lightly~ Bad thoughts stop giving Vee bad ideas.)

    I'll do the next time. Have to try to stay calm and not get mad (Issue with that sometimes) but, I'll try that's the best I can say.

    I think the Verifications are Jacked the hell up.

  8. All you can do is try. That's the best anyone can ask you for.

    I'll have to keep thinking about it. I need to start over somewhere and man I've wanted to live in Boston since I was 6, but it's so damn expensive!!! GGGggggrrrr!!! If I get published though.....

    I'm happy that you don't have to know what your life would be like without your partners. Really glad.

    The word verification is just for shits and giggles I think.

  9. If you get published hun you will get published your material is epicly amazing!

    I'm glad as well Vee you have no idea how good I feel right now.

  10. Thank you Lucy/Kat!!!!! You are such a sweetheart. I have been really freaking out over my writing here lately and I needed that encouragement.

    I can only imagine how happy you are, and it's only a fraction of how you feel I bet.

  11. Oh believe me on this when you have your own partner you'll know how I feel for mine. It's that simple. Everything feels amazing when I get to talk to them. Feels like I am falling and being caught and sometimes it just feels like floating on clouds. Yet, that is even with the bad times as well because we work through those together and cut off any other problems that might happen that is affected through that very problem we were having. We still have fights but what people in a relationship or in my case relationships don't?

    You are welcome and you need that uplift. You are one amazing writer and I am hoping for the vest for you!

  12. I can't wait.

    And thank you again. I spend a lot of time uplifting and encouraging others that whenever I get uplifted or encouraged it's a huge breath of fresh air. So thank you.

  13. Your welcome Hun whenever you need it I'm here (Unless I am asleep or out to town that is!)

  14. LOL. Understandable.

    I do appreciate you. Every comment just endears you to me even more. So thanks....again.

  15. ~Huggles tight~ You uplift people a lot and I try to up lift as well

  16. And we all appreciate it. We really do.

  17. Oh I know everyone shows it and they don't do it half hearted either.

  18. That's good. People should show how they feel out loud and in a big way, especially when appreciating someone else.