I have been trying to tell myself that it will all be alright. That my 19 year old nephew is going to make it. Yet, all I have been doing for the last two days is thinking is. What If? I am so scared I haven't even told my loves about it yet because I don't want to break down sobbing like a baby anymore.
He stopped taking his meds and took a whole bunch of muscle relaxers and I don't know what all happened. He was life flighted out to Huntington, West Virginia late on Sunday night. I didn't know until yesterday in the morning. I was trying to wrap my head around it. I don't know what to think or what to even say. My oldest sister his mother is there with him, but she can't stay at his side all the time
I just want to roll up into a ball and cry. Why did he do it? What made him go off the deep end? I just don't understand at all. I'm so tired yet I can't sleep I can't think and I'm trying to understand. Just need prayers right now. I am praying myself and just trying hard to remember that it is going to get worse before it gets better.
Hoping and praying for the best though! Just got to keep praying and trying to be strong again. But, this is the nephew that is just five months younger than me....his birthday is coming up so he'll be 20 years old and then soon after that I will turn 21. It's scary for me and just I am very scared right now. Trying hard to get that strength that I normally have it feels like it is missing.
This is just me figuring out some things in my life. Sharing the things in my life both past and present. Some are leading up to the present and some of the past affects how I live my life today. This blog is not for people who are faint of heart. So if you have a problem with honesty and Bisexuality and Gays and Lesbians then you don't need to read this blog. Oh yes and many thanks to Matt from the blog 2 boys In Love. He gave me the idea for my blog with the Mini-Adult!
Embrace The Rainbow
Embrace The Rainbow
I'm just going to update this here in comments. He's awake still has the feeding tube in and I guess he's doing better we will see how this goes. I'm still praying.
ReplyDeleteMy prayers are with him and all of you. Sending what little strength I have left over the wire to you. Hang in there and think positive thoughts.
ReplyDeleteI'm trying Sidney really I am. Thank you it means a lot to much going on with my life to deal with all this on top of it. But, I'm doing it anyways. ~Hugs Sidney~ Thanks again means a lot
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